I suppose the best fantasy, in these circumstances is that she had played T&D and chastity games before. Then the baggage could be used positively.
Of course it could mean that she is further along than you. Whatever the position, a relationship is a team effort. Like a team of horses pulling a cart. If the horses are going at different speeds, the cart fall over.
The general answer is easy: communication. What you communicate is the difficult bit.
Good luck.
